A Funeral in a Catholic Church
Death is something which we will all have to deal with at some point in our lives and, no matter the circumstances or the age of the person, it is always difficult because this is a very final farewell to someone who has been an important part of our lives. Making preparations for the funeral of a loved one is also an emotionally difficult thing to do as it comes at the time when we most want to grieve.
The Funeral Mass or Funeral Service is a time of prayer for the person who has died, that the Lord may be merciful to them and grant them a place in heaven. The purpose of coming to the church for a funeral is to seek God’s comfort at this difficult time and to pray for the person who has died, that the Lord may be merciful to them and bring them swiftly to heaven. The funeral is not about the living, but about praying for the eternal life of the dead and all the prayers, readings and texts point to that. It takes place within a church, a place dedicated to the worship and praise of God. Therefore, nothing should be done which would go against the sanctity of that place or would deny the presence of God.
Preparing for a Catholic Church Funeral
The family are invited and encouraged to participate as fully as possible in the Funeral Mass or Service for their loved one. The following are places where members of the family can take an active participation:
Readings from Scripture: can be read by one or two people.
Prayer of the Faithful: these can be read by one or more people.
The Offertory: in this the bread and wine alone are brought forward to the priest and will become the Body and Blood of Jesus Christ. This can involve two or more people.
In all of this, it is good to speak with the priest who will be officiating and who can give whatever help and guidance is necessary.
Selecting Readings
Readings for a Catholic Church Funeral
The readings used during the Liturgy of the Word all come from the Bible, from Sacred Scripture. They contain God’s word for us and in those words we find hope and comfort. Secular readings or reflections may not be used during the Liturgy of the Word.
The readings can be read by family or friends and the Gospel is read by a priest or deacon. The Responsorial Psalm can be sung by a cantor (soloist) or choir or it can be read by a reader. If necessary, one person can do all the readings.
It is also important to think about who will be reading: reading in church is not easy and it is necessary that the person be able to speak slowly, loudly, clearly and confidently.
Music
A Catholic funeral takes place in a church, in a space dedicated to the worship of God and prayer to him. So too the music. A hymn, like a prayer, is intended to remind us of the presence of God and is clearly and explicitly oriented towards God. Secular or non-religious songs are not appropriate in that religious setting and are not permitted by the General Instruction of the Roman Missal.
It is essential to think about that and to pay careful attention to the music being used and to the wording of the hymns. Be aware that certain hymns are only appropriate at certain times of the year so that, for example, Easter hymns are not sung in the Season of Lent.
Cantor and Musician
It is important to consider who will be singing or providing music for the funeral. Singing in a church is very different from singing in a pub or other public venue where the singer is often competing with other voices and noises – there will be quietness in the church. Churches have their own sound systems and, therefore, extra amplification – such as large loudspeakers – are unnecessary and counter-productive. Using additional loudspeakers also has the common effect of rendering the singer(s) very loud and shrill because of the acoustics in a church building – a truly good singer will need no additional amplification. The majority of churches have an organ (which is appropriate to the size of the church) and so there is no need for other instruments.
Keep in mind too that hymns – like the responses to the prayers – are intended for community involvement and the cantor is simply a leader in that singing – it is not a performance or a ‘gig’. It is a good idea to have hymns which those attending are familiar with and so can join in. It is also possible to have instrumental music without a singer, but again this depends on the piece of music in question.
The church and undertaker will have contacts for cantors and organists who they can recommend and who are used to singing hymns in church.
The different moments when hymns are recommended:
The Entrance Procession: as the coffin enters the church and moves to the sanctuary.
The Responsorial Psalm and Gospel Acclamation.
The Offertory: as the gifts of bread and wine are brought to and prepared at the altar.
During Holy Communion.
The Recessional: as the coffin leaves the church at the end of the liturgy.
Symbols
Some families wish to bring symbols to remember their deceased loved one. This is purely optional and is not an obligatory part of the funeral, and so can be left out. If symbols or photographs are brought forward, they are placed on a small table: the coffin is not a platform to display mementoes of the dead and is to be kept free for the blessings which take place during the funeral. This also applies to flowers. Flags (including the national flag) and other banners are not permitted on the coffin once inside the church. Symbols are not part of the Offertory and so are placed on the table soon after the coffin arrives at the sanctuary.
Words on behalf of the Family
Some families wish to have a member of the family deliver a few words: this is completely optional and is not required—a family should not feel pressured into doing this. As a eulogy is not permitted during Mass, the best place for a eulogy is when the family gather in the home or in the funeral home, or at a later gathering. If family words must take place in the church, these should be very few and are intended to be words of thanks to those who have supported the family and the person who has died. Therefore, they should take place before the Mass begins and should be words of welcome and thanks carefully and clearly delivered, and they should be brief—no more than two or three minutes.
Various Funeral Services and Prayers
For many years it was the custom that people were brought to the church the evening before the Funeral was to take place. Upon arrival there was a brief prayer service led by a priest or deacon and, at the end of the prayers, sympathisers would come forward and greet the members of the family. In more recent years, this has been replaced with an evening gathering around the remains in the family home or in the funeral home. If there is no removal to the church on the evening before, then the remains are received in the church shortly before the Mass or Service and the Mass/Service begins when the remains arrive at the sanctuary.
At the end of the Mass/Service is the Final Commendation when the remains are blessed with holy water and incense before the coffin is taken from the church. At the grave, or in the crematorium, prayers are once again offered and it should be remembered that this, too, is a prayer to God for the deceased and should be conducted accordingly. Increasingly, the prayers in the funeral home and at the graveside are being led by trained lay people where a priest is not available.
Who do I contact?
Apart from informing family and friends, it is important to begin making formal arrangements as soon as possible. The first contact should be the undertakers. They will visit the family soon after or invite the family to their offices and they will begin making all the other calls that are necessary. They will contact the church and priest on behalf of the family; they will contact the graveyard and make the appropriate arrangements for burial or cremation; and they will make the formal announcements for RIP.ie and whatever newspapers the announcement is to appear in.
The priest will then make contact with the family and will meet with them to help prepare for the formal Funeral Mass or Service in the church.
Bereavement Counselling & Support Services
The Diocese of Waterford & Lismore provides local and outreach services for bereaved adults. For further information, telephone (051) 858 772.